Writing About Writers Block

If you write it, the words will come?
Well, here I am.  Typing some stupid words out in hopes that a little bit of typing may spawn a little bit more. Sitting out on the deck in hopes that a change of venue may get the creative juices flowing.
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My OCD preventing me from feeling the least bit comfortable in my skin. The dirt on our little glass table is making me feel like I need to go grab the windex instead of continue typing.
A hoodie to cover my arms will have to do for now.
I sit here watching the sun set and I know how blessed I am. How much better off I am now than I was a year ago. I no longer live in the ghetto or have to worry about getting shot or mugged as I walk to my door after work.  I am no longer alone. I live with someone I can call my best friend who makes me smile and keeps me safe. Who is now there when there is no one else. Someone I love very much.  I have a great family who I also love very much that I can be sure loves me just the same.
So why do I feel like I have this dark cloud over me? Why do I feel like my brain is a jumbled mess of incomprehensible gibberish? Like a string of christmas lights taken out of the box from last year, the more you try to untangle them, the more tangled they become.
It's difficult to have a story if there is no conflict.  Isn't that the main idea of a story after all?
I don't need anymore conflict. I have already had enough to last a few lifetimes.
So what do I write about now? Or maybe I should just stop writing. Or start writing fiction. I think my brain unlearned how to do that a long time ago.
I need to find a pathway to spiritual enlightenment. I need a deep cleanse to clear this fog.

Sometimes listening to music also helps the creative process. While attempting to make the words happen and listening to Slacker Radio this song by moby comes on.
It seems more than a little fitting to my current mood. It almost brings the tears I know I need to shed. To expel some of these demons out of my body in the form of human raindrops.  Almost, but not quite.
For now I will wait for the predicted storm that will probably never happen.